


You Are My Sunshine

by heroalba



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Fluff, M/M, episode 12 didn't happen haha, nightmare fic, or did it, tooth-meltingly sweet fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-27
Updated: 2015-03-27
Packaged: 2018-03-19 20:20:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3622977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heroalba/pseuds/heroalba
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I wrote something for the beginning, I may as well write something for the end.</p><p>AKA, this is how √A ended and no one can tell me otherwise.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Are My Sunshine

Kaneki blinked awake, gasping in air as though he was surprised he still could. He reflexively sat up, smelling the blood in the air and feeling sharp pain in his side, his danger senses on fire.

When he wasn’t immediately assaulted he let out the breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding, his fingers clenching in the fabric of his shorts.

The scenery was familiar, now that he was calmed down, and the warm, familiar smell of coffee could almost make it seem like he hadn’t just been struck down by an investigator. On first glance, he assumed it was just another nightmare. But the flashing lights in the windows and vague, distant shouts, coupled with the pain in his side from Amon’s quinque, proved him wrong.

He tensed up as he heard footsteps, his body reactive instinctively to the possible threat while he scrambled to his feet. He felt his kakugan pulse, his rinkaku poised to break through his skin in an instant to attack.  
  
Then he took a deep breath, exhaling a choked little sound when another familiar scent mixed with that of coffee and warm brown eyes smiled into his own. Claws of ice dug their way into his heart and he took a step back, the reminder of his non-humanness slamming into his gut like a freight train.

 

“Yo, Kaneki!”

 

He’d almost killed Hide. 

His face must have been as white as his hair, because Hide snickered at him, his eyes still tender as he approached a table by the window. Kaneki half-noticed the steaming cups of coffee held in his friend’s hands and focused on that, not daring to look the blond in the eye. He would feel too ashamed.

“Coffee’s hard to make, huh? Well, to make it just right...” Hide went on, his voice just like how Kaneki had remembered it. He heard a slight clink, his eyes following the cups as Hide set one down and leaned into the wall, mouth set in that contemplative way he had. He took a sip and it would have been comical, the way his nose scrunched up and the corners of his eyes wrinkled, if they weren’t in the situation they found themselves in. 

_Hide isn’t supposed to be here._

The blond let out a sharp laugh, voice laced with disappointment.

“This one’s bad too. Sorry Kaneki,” he added with a little sheepish quirk of his lips, and the way his gaze seemed to bore into Kaneki’s made him suddenly remember the glaring red-and-black eye staring back at Hide.

He slapped his hand over his face, pressing the heel of his palm into his eye and refusing to hiss at the feeling. He’d let Hide  _see_  Hide  _knew_  he was a monster Hide  _knew he kn **ew he knew.**_

But Hide didn’t give him the response he had been expecting (anger, shock, yelling, calling him a  _freak_ , a  ** _monster_** ), instead staying silent. Long seconds dragged on and Kaneki heard liquid dripping to the floor. Assuming it was his own blood from his torn side, he stayed as still as possible. As if, just maybe, Hide would see through him and leave this mess that he  _didn’t belong in_  behind.

But he didn’t. He stayed silent for another moment and Kaneki held his breath, daring to glance up with his human eye.

Hide was looking at him with such warmth it made his heart swell and his fists unclench.

“Don’t do that,” he chided gently with a laugh, the same one he used to use when Kaneki showed up on his doorstep as a kid after a particularly bad night with his aunt. Tears welled in Kaneki’s eyes and Hide’s expression quickly fell.

“Hey, man,” he started, then paused.

“I already knew.”

Kaneki’s heart stopped and his eyes widened in panic, so Hide quickly continued, 

“Yeah, I knew.”

Shock colored the half-ghoul’s face and Hide smiled comfortingly. He moved to sit down and Kaneki heard more blood drip to the floor. Amon had really torn him open if his regenerative abilities were so slow...

His voice rose in his throat but wouldn’t leave his mouth to ask the questions he so desperately wanted to ask- “How?” “Then you hate me?” “But I’m a ghoul- how are you so calm about this?”

But Hide had always been good at reading him (he once said he was the most complicated book he’d ever read) and probably saw the queries written out in his expression. He abandoned his coffee to stand, shaky with his hands braced on the table.

“Remember when Nishiki-senpai beat the crap out of me?” he asked, and Kaneki flinched at the memory. Hide chuckled and his voice was strained (Kaneki didn’t understand how he could be so  _calm_  about all this if Kaneki weren’t a half-ghoul he would have never come in contact with this world and never gotten hurt).

“I played dead, but man that guy really doesn’t know mercy does he?”

 _Oh_. Then he had seen-

“I never got to thank you for giving your all to protect me back then,” Hide continued, and the sincerity of his words hurt more than the thought of him thinking Kaneki was another mindless monster. He wanted to drop to his knees and cry (he didn’t deserve this kindness, he’d been anything but a good friend to Hide), but he managed to stay standing. 

The other teen shrugged, expression open and genuine.

“You shouldn’t blame yourself for stuff like this. I know you like doing that.”

Kaneki slowly, hesitantly lowered his hand at that, and Hide smiled again, his eyes glittering like sunlight in the dimness of the coffee shop.

“You should hear how famous you’ve gotten, man,” he started, raising his own hand to cover his eye. Kaneki stared at him, perplexed and mildly embarrassed, as the blond snickered.

“They call you ‘Eyepatch’- how cool is that?”

He snickered, a bit louder, and added,

“You stylin’ it up?”

The question was laced with humor, and the absurdity of the situation made Kaneki smile against his will, a sudden laugh bubbling out of his chest. And then he kept laughing, because he’d forgotten what it felt like and how  _good_  it felt. To genuinely laugh.

The fact that Hide started laughing with him made it better, the rich warmness of his friend’s voice filling the air.

And then-

And then Hide’s legs gave out, and his laughter trailed off into ragged, wet coughs. The half-ghoul was startled and just stared as the blond’s knees hit the floor with a thump and wet splash, the blood that had been pooling under him splashing up on his CCG uniform. 

“H-Hide...?”

The blond flashed him a smile, clutching at his chest. Kaneki looked and his stomach flipped in on itself when he saw the hole in the sturdy armor the foot soldiers for the CCG wore, blood trickling out around the edges.

He tried to move but his body was so slow.

Kaneki collapsed to his knees before his friend just in time, a bloodied hand clutching at his shoulder tightly. He felt cooling blood, sticky, soak into his suit and his nose twitched instinctively.

“I messed up pretty bad out there,” the human kneeling in front of him wheezed, and Kaneki’s fingers twisted in his shorts, torn between wanting to comfort Hide and wanting to stay away to prevent further damage to his frail friend.

The blond lifted his head, blood running down his chin and a serene smile on his face. Kaneki’s heart stopped for a moment, mismatched eyes searching the other teen’s face.   
Then Hide barked out a laugh, fingertips digging harshly into his shoulder and his eyes glazing with pain and longing.

“Let’s go home, Kaneki.”

His voice rasped out, drenched in pain, but his smile never faded even as his grip loosened and he leaned forward, head resting against Kaneki’s chest. He panted quietly and the half-ghoul cautiously lifted his arms to support him.

 He heard a long sigh and then Hide went limp in his arms, his knuckles making a hollow thudding noise as his hand fell from his shoulder.

The heat drained slowly from Kaneki’s fingertips, and the only thing he could hear was the roar of his heartbeat in his ears as he let his best friend’s body, already cool to the touch, fall into his lap.

The tears he hadn’t noticed welling in his eyes grew fat and rolled down his cheeks, and his fingers twitched with hesitance before going to settle in Hide’s hair, against his chest, brushing the cool skin of his throat and cheek. He gingerly pushed, prodded,  _prayed_  that the blond would wake up to gripe at him, but he just laid there in Kaneki’s lap, face so serene. Like he was sleeping.

Kaneki didn’t know when the building caught fire, windows breaking and the blood drying powdery and fine on his suit from the heat. And he honestly didn’t care.

His eyes hadn’t left Hide’s face, his lips still quirked in a faint smile and his eyes closed, lashes brushing his cheeks.

Kaneki’s fingers were curled uselessly around Hide’s own cold, stiff digits, his kakugan fading slowly. The fire crackled and popped ominously around him but he was glued to his spot, his legs too weak to support him.

Hide was dead. The Hide who befriended him, someone who didn’t have a voice, and who shielded him from his aunt and all the bad things he’d ever endured. The Hide who followed him through college and had abandoned his entire life to see him again.

He was gone, and Kaneki was perfectly content to let the flames lick into his skin, burning and boiling his blood and sending pain sparking through him.

He was going home.

 

* * *

 

 

Kaneki awoke with a start, the cool, sweat-soaked sheets against his skin a sharp contrast to the fires he’d let consume him moments before. But that wasn’t important; his breath quickened when he remembered the pale, bloodless face of his friend smiling up at him from his lap and he tensed in panic.

A sleepy groan next to him snapped his attention away, tanned arms wrapping loosely around his waist.

Tears pricked his eyes when he looked over to find Hide next to him, in their bed.

A  _dream._

Just to make sure, to quell his own fears, he leaned over the blond cautiously, fingers pale and reverent as he traced them over his jaw.   
Hide twitched under the touch, his nose scrunching up, but Kaneki wasn’t focused on that. He let his fingers trail until he found Hide’s pulse, throbbing warm and strong, in the hollow of his throat.

The empty feeling of despair his dream had instilled in him was slightly filled, and he couldn’t help but wrap his arms more fully around the other, shifting so their legs were entangled and Hide’s breath puffed out on his face.

Hide groaned again and Kaneki made sure to be careful when he let his fingers drift from Hide’s throat to his bare chest, his fingers trembling as they found the raised ridge.

His mind hadn’t fabricated everything.

Kaneki felt along the thick, gnarled scar tissue left behind from the Anteiku raid, the skin warm and firm under his touch. Hide had healed. He was alive.

But he should have died (though Kaneki was glad he hadn’t), the blow from Noro having caused him to lose a dangerous amount of blood.

But Kaneki had saved Hide for once, instead of the other way around. He had carried him out of the flaming ruins of Anteiku and to safety- he had gotten help for him. Albeit from his enemies, but anything was better than the fate Hide would have suffered had he sat there uselessly instead.  
The cost had been great but-

He blinked back into reality when a warm hand covered his own, a slight blush rising to his cheeks when he realized he’d been caught.

“H-Hide, you’re up,” he started, and the blond grinned drowsily, moving forward to press his lips chastely to Kaneki’s.

“Trying to feel me up in my sleep,” Hide accused.  
“So bold of you.”

Kaneki blushed darker but his eyes went hazy, vision blurring with tears suddenly. Hide’s tone of voice changed very quickly when he noticed, and he frowned, rubbing his thumb over Kaneki’s hand soothingly.

“What’s wrong?”

Then he blinked and scowled before Kaneki could answer (”I wouldn’t have this and it would have been all my fault, this is all my fault  _I’m so sorry_ ”).

“This?” he asked, squeezing Kaneki’s hand where it was placed over his scar. The white-haired ghoul stiffened, and Hide’s scowl deepened.

“I’ve already told you not to worry about things like this, right? It wasn’t your fault, I was careless,” he added, and Kaneki’s fingers curled (gently) against his skin, so warm to the touch.

“But-”

“No buts,” Hide interrupted, puffing his cheeks out and squirming so he could flick the tip of Kaneki’s nose with his free fingers.  
  
The tears welled up higher, threatening to overflow, and the blond groaned. But the tears were happy, Kaneki’s heart swelling with the love he felt for his friend.

“If you cry,” Hide warned, tapping his nose again.

“I’m gonna tickle you so hard you won’t know what tears of sadness even are.”

The statement was so ludicrous that they both erupted into giggles after a moment, Kaneki’s eyes squeezing shut to keep his tears from falling as per request (demand).

When he opened them he was face to face with Hide’s adoring gaze and his breath caught, his skin flushing uncomfortably warm. Hide leaned in for another kiss, this time prolonging it into one of those sweet movie kisses, their noses brushing and Kaneki’s heart thumping in his throat.

He pulled back to press light, feathery kisses to the ghoul’s cheeks, nose, and eyelids, his hair tickling Kaneki’s face and causing him to chuckle.

“You don’t have to worry now, okay? About anything.”

He smiled, and Kaneki’s fingers tangled in his hair to tug him down for another slow kiss.

“We’re home now.”


End file.
